My wife has been working through the experiences of her past abuse; but what can I do?
Being in a position where you care deeply for someone who is trying to process past pain is hard. It's often a slow process for your partner, and there are highs and lows for them as they think about their past and try to process it. So much of the emotional ups and downs are outside your control, and that can make you feel powerless. So what do you do with that?
You care about the people who are important in your life so you want to protect them. You want to protect the woman you love. But she probably just wants you to let it go, and wants you to be present for her.
Okay, that's nice that to feel her wanting your support. But how do you protect her with that? Or...if you give her the space to process things on our own and she comes through the other side, feels okay about what happened, but you haven't yet?
What has happened if her abuser is in some way connected to her life through family, local cities, social media, etc. How do you sit with respecting where your wife is at and processing your own stuff.
Frankly, These are hard situations. But the fact is that though your situation is unique, there are other men processing similar situations. That's the value of Group therapy, doing this together!
You don't have to figure this out alone, let's journey together with men who appreciate what you're working through.
The Group counseling process:
Group therapy offers a unique sanctuary for men whose wives have experienced past sexual abuse. By creating a shared space of understanding and camaraderie, it provides an avenue for these men to express often suppressed emotions, learn from the collective experiences of the group, and receive validation for their feelings. Additionally, group therapy provides essential insights into the intricacies of trauma, equipping them with tools to better support their partners while also emphasizing the importance of self-care. In a collective setting, men can collaboratively explore strategies for rebuilding trust, enhancing communication, and fostering intimacy, all while benefiting from the mutual support and understanding that comes from shared journeys.
Each group therapy session is 90 minutes long. The group will be 5 weeks long and every member will be screened to support group dynamics and keep it as useful an experience possible for all participants. It's not a process that is over immediately, but sharing your experience, and hearing other men is empowering and can bring hope and renovation to your relationship.